Above: Opia | The Ambiguous Intensity Of Eye Contact.
I really hate making eye contact with people, I’m not sure I can physically do it for extended periods of time. Society says its rude to be staring off into the distance or at your feet but when I try to look at someone directly in the eye its like this intense weight is pushing on me until I have to look away.
Its a similar feeling to look out a window at night, the certain fear of the unknown beyond the dark little window, or the unsettling feeling when looking into a mirror too intently for too long, when everything kinda melts away into a dark blur and only the eyes remain. Maybe in a way by having my own existence observed so strongly it makes me question what my existence really is and the lack of answers is sometimes frightening.
The ambiguous intensity of looking someone in the eye, which can feel simultaneously invasive and vulnerable. Their pupils glittering, bottomless, and opaque, as if you were looking through a hole in the door of a house, able to tell that there is someone standing there, but unable to tell if you are looking in or looking out.